Quite recently I’ve seen an outbreak of depressing and hope depriving statuses scattered across the social internet.  Funnily enough, this is the kind of saddening banter that filled MySpace up to the brim before it toppled sideways and everyone ran out trying to find a Book with their Face in it.  Inevitably social media is going to result in a lot of moody updates. Now emotions are something that will reach high peaks, low peaks – sometimes they even manage to balance in between.  But the problem here is that when these natural emotions are combined with the interlocking connectivity of the internet they are amplified to the point that all the statistics reporting on depression these days make complete and perfect sense.

Before the social web, whenever we felt low or depressed we would usually only have to deal with our own problems – but now with the internet, you’re being linked up with all of your friends – all at once.  Now although they can give you support when you post about your issues, they may also be posting about their own problems.  Something that really doesn’t help your ability to bounce back mentally from some sad thoughts, is reading other sad thoughts.  Imagine that you have stubbed your toe – and it’s really sore – if you then decide to start kicking the door toe-first, your toe is probably going to take far longer to recover from your incredibly apocalyptic ordeal.

Now I’m not saying that outside of these networks we never hear about peoples problems’ while we have our own.  What I’m saying is that we are exposing ourselves to even more negativity than we would usually.  Now I can’t really talk much in this department – but there are a large chunk of people, particularly teens – that have hundreds of ‘friends.’

I say ‘friends’ with quotations because they clearly have no idea who all of these people are personally.

This magnitude of people… it’d drive you absolutely crazy.  You’d never comfortably meet up with all these people all at once outside of the internet, and yet… every thought and opinion is rushing to us instantly every day.

All I ask is, don’t fall.  Do something creative, take your mind off it.  Force yourself to do something for you for a change.  Turn off the notifications, make yourself a hot chocolate, sit up comfortably in bed and just relax.  Close your eyes if you have to… but drink your hot chocolate first, you really don’t want to fall asleep with that hovering above your lap.

Thanks again for reading beings!

Ben,

Hey there!

Now as many of you would know because I’ve been talking about it for a while, I’ve been making a new YouTube channel for my personal vlogs and projects.  Well that channel has now issued its first video vlog/thing, ‘the INTRODUCTION!’

I’ve been editing this on and off for the last few weeks – and I’m really disappointed with it.

The video itself has been uploaded to YouTube probably 4 times with different tweaks and alterations in an attempt to get something I actually like.  But if I don’t just suck it up and get it out-of-the-way I’ll never end up actually doing anything with the channel.  Anyhow, sorry for the short post.  I do intend to go more into detail later on when I’m in a writing mood.

See you later,

Ben.

My mind isn’t the person that my mouth describes.

One thing that has always annoyed me is that my consciousness seems to be on a whole different plane to who I am when I speak.  There is so much going on, so many thoughts, this seriousness, this seemingly knowledgeable being inside that never actually appears to exist at all.  Because the moment I start talking those thoughts of entirety are lost and I am all but a mere idiot.  A pathetic shadow who tries to imitate the person inside who looks down on me with discontent.  A disciple who has failed to preach the message that had been sent.

For my mouth acts differently, whereas in this scenario I can attempt to type out every word that flashes into my mind – I can’t when I talk.  Talking just leaves room for a slurry of  unintentional mess that lacks the meaning, the depth and the wisdom that seemed to be present before it had all been forcefully summarised, chopped up and spat out into a load of irrational nonsense.  Even now I stare at the words that I have written, still not matching those that I have thought of earlier – but in the absence of some form writing medium all those words have slowly hidden away.  Once again I look down upon what I have written, displeased with my failure to relay my own message.

Sorry for the short post.

Ben,