The Joke, The Solution, The Consequences.

Hey everyone, girls and guys alike! Welcome to the new school year, some are Grade 10, 9, even 11 in some cases (if you are going to college).

I was sitting in English today, thinking away about what just to write about. School, my job, my family, maybe even a simple thing I noticed while walking down a street… then, one of my friends thought up an idea, a post based on a joke I said to him at some point during the day.

It goes like this:

“Pollen is essentially ‘plant sperm.’ Therefore, Hay fever is an STD.

Because pollen is not voluntarily taken in by humans, we are all being raped by trees.

Conclusion: Deforestation is the key.

So take that environment. You rape us, we rape you right back!”

I came across this joke while browsing Facebook. Quite intrigued by the joke, I put it up on what was my “wall,” and received multiple ‘likes’ and several comments…

You may be thinking something along the lines of: “Why the heck is he writing about this??” or “This joke makes no sense in terms of preventing hay fever.”

I will tell you something right now. It does, but with serious consequences and flaws of course. Firstly, if someone decided to destroy an entire ecosystem, they would be thrown into the psych ward of the nearest hospital. Then, they would be put in solitary confinement if they still planned to go ahead with their project.

Secondly, if you actually managed to cut down every tree in the world, we would eventually run out of oxygen and end up a bit like the planet Venus. Besides, as some may be thinking now, hay fever is not just caused by trees, it is caused mainly by grass and a variety of plants…

An absolute maniac would now be saying, “Burn the land!! Destroy all the grass and plants that cause hay fever!!”

Lastly, if the world somehow went to drastic measures like these, there would be panic all across the globe with people preparing for the worse. This is where Julia Gillard steps in and says, “Bring on the Carbon Tax policies!!”

So, if I come up with a plan like this, please put me up against a wall and shoot me.

Until next time,


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The Body of Control

Water, nice cold water. Ahh, sorry about that, slightly distracted.

SO! First day back at school, and it was relatively warm, and since I’m incredibly organised I didn’t bother buying a new drink bottle or cleaning one out in time. Hence, I spent the day in a roulette of thirst, all dependent on which classrooms had the air conditioning on.

[Just noticed because of a typo that, add a ‘H’ to ‘air conditioning’ and you really do get quite a different sentence.]

This isn’t a post about surviving thirst, there’s not going to be an elaborate story that includes snake skins and a full bladder and a non-existent gag reflex. I’m talking about when I finally was able to purchase a bottle of water from the shop at the end of the day.

Now my Society teacher would probably ask me to add what I just wrote to our first work unit on, “What living standards are like in Australia,” as: being able to purchase clean drinking water, but again… this isn’t a post about that either.

What I had in mind is more do with our body’s control over us. “Ben, have you taken your medication today?” I’ve mentioned something similar to this before, where I spoke about how in sex education they the informed us thoroughly about sexual feelings, and how much it seemed to me like the body hanging a carrot on a stick trying to get us to breed like rabbits… I wonder if the carrot hanging on a stick has something to do with the rabbits insane breeding patterns? …Anyways.

As I poured the icy cool water down my parched dry throat, I found it curious that it felt incredibly relieving, how it made you feel good. I noted that it’s almost like your body liked the fact you were finally giving it the water it ordered numerous hours ago when it initiated it’s dry throat protocol, and was rewarding you for it by releasing endorphins.

Could this be the case? Could our sub conscious really be our ACTUAL body? We’re like taking the reins of this moving living thing, and the sub conscious is just making sure we drive it right?
“Hey moron! You left the tap on! NO YOU NEED FOOD NOW! Yuck, why did you eat this, this isn’t good for you at all, take it back!”

Think about it, it sounds pretty plausible, I mean, we don’t choose to throw up food if we eat too much, or something that doesn’t agree with us, sure, we can force ourselves to throw up, but our body can do it by itself without shoving anything down our throat. Our body decides when to sweat, breath, blink, yes we have some control over some of these things, but still. If the body ever needs something it fires the alarm, something to let us know, almost as if it can’t directly communicate with us, but it can let us know via different methods.

What do you think?

Is your body running the show?

Thanks for reading yet another insane post (I don’t mean as in AWESOME…)


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the simple gift – Cover Analysis

 In English we had to do a cover analysis of the book the simple gift by Steven Herrick.

 This is what I came up with:

the simple gift by Steven Herrick

The cover of the verse novel, the simple gift, provokes contrasting feelings of warmth, calamity, despondency and hope. The reflection of a sunrise or sunset suggests the end of an era or a new beginning. The colours and images suggest the novel is a coming of age story aimed at young adults.

Depicted in the centre of the cover is an outward facing hand holding an old style key. The hand looks aged and the sleeve of a maroon jumper suggests it belongs to a man. The key is placed in his left hand which indicates he is receiving it either as a gift or maybe a prize. It could symbolise the key to someone’s heart or the key to happiness or maybe it unlocks the door to a new world, a better world. I think the key might be a sign that there is still hope.

Situated behind the hand is what looks to be storm clouds. They seem to be split in half at the middle of the page. A sunrise or sunset is reflected on the bottom half of the clouds, tinting them with orange. This could suggest the end of an era or a new beginning. The black in the top of the clouds instils a feeling of mystery and fear and suggests great tragedy or misfortune, whereas the orange suggests warmth and balance. It could also mean that the protagonist is demanding of attention.

In between the two halves of cloud is a picture of a train track. This leads one to believe that the protagonist may be running from or to something, breaking through the darkness and away from misery. Maybe the story is about someone going on a journey to find happiness, taking a chance, catching a train to an unknown destination, running away from tragedy not knowing where they will end up, leaving with nothing but hope for a better life and a key, possibly the key to happiness. The train track, like the sunset, could symbolise a new beginning, a change of times.

Next one’s eyes move to the title at the top of the page, the simple gift. What is the simple gift? Love? Happiness? Freedom? Could it be the key in the man’s hand? That which unlocks the door to what one most wants? That, to me, is the simple gift. The text is a light purple which symbolises the foundation of all that is, a combination of strength and mercy. It suggests that the protagonist is imaginative, visionary, etheric and a daydreamer. In the title the word ‘the’ is the smallest out of them all; it is situated above the word ‘simple’ and to the left. This is most likely done because ‘the’ is the least important word in the title. Next is the word ‘simple’. It is the largest word on the page which suggests it is the most important word. The word ‘gift’ is slightly larger than ‘the’ but smaller than ‘simple’. It is situated underneath the word ‘simple’ and to the right. The font is simple, keeping in theme with the title and has no uppercase letters.

The only other text on the page is the author’s name, Steven Herrick. It appears to be in the same font as the title but this time uppercase letters are used because it is his name. The text is still purple but it is a slightly darker shade and it is situated at the bottom of the page. This is most likely done because the publisher feels the authors name is not as important as the title, marketing wise. Or it could just be an aesthetic choice, done to balance out the page and put the emphasis on the image in the middle.

One’s eyes will also come across a small silhouette of a power line in the right corner of the page. This could just be for aesthetic purposes, in keeping with the theme of trains, but I think there is more to it.  It may be there to put an emphasis on the train tracks or it may indicate power, authority, command and control. It looks like it is in the distance; fading, like the life he is leaving. I believe the power line is there to represent the life and the unruly authority the protagonist is running away from.

I imagine the novel will be about an elderly man telling the story about the time he ran away from home in search of a better place. Tales will be told of his journey out of the darkness and into light, of all the trouble he got in, all the mess he made and how he found a way out of it all, how he found love, happiness and the place where he truly belonged.




Rise up – Blessthefall

Keep your eyes focused this time
Keep us in front of your sights
I’ve waited long for this, now it’s our time for bliss
I just hope we have the time,
I stand broken please God hear my cries
He does every time

How many times have you watched me fall just to smile,
I’ve been through thick and thin we’ve struggled through now we smile,
so we’re here now just be ready, brace yourself cause were not leaving

Keep your eyes focused this time
Keep us in front of your sights.
I’ve waited long for this, our time to shine
I just hope we have the time,
I stand broken, please God hear my cries
He does every time

Help us get out, Help us get out out into the open
Help us grow, rise up, rise up
Help us grow, rise up, rise up
Help us grow, rise up, rise up
Help us grow, rise up, rise up

I stand broken, please God hear my cries
He does every time
I stand broken, please God hear my cries
He does every time, he does every time

Keep your eyes focused this time
Keep us in front of your sights
I’ve waited long for this, now it’s our time for bliss
I just hope we have the time,
I stand broken please God hear my cries
He does every time

Rating: 5/5

This song is AMAZING! one of my favourites! 😀

Fix: AOE2 & SWGB, “Can’t find saved scenario files in explorer”

Can’t find your Scenario you made in Scenario Editor? You’re trying the find the “.scx” file but it just doesn’t save to the “/Scenario” folder. It probably is pissing you off as much as it did me.

This is a problem that happens with Age Of Empires 2 and Star Wars Galatic Battlegrounds when run on Windows Vista or Windows 7, it’s to do with Administrator settings, and the program/game not being allowed to actually save in the ‘/Scenario’ folder.

Text Instructions:

  1. Go to the game install directory
  2. Right-click on ‘Scenario‘ and then choose ‘Properties
  3. Click on the ‘Security‘ tab, then click on ‘Edit
  4. Click on ‘Users‘ and then tick the ‘Full Control‘ tickbox

Then run Star Wars Galactic Battlegrounds or Age of Empires 2, open your map in the scenario editor and ‘Save As,’ and choose a different name. The scenario will have saved into C:/Program Files/Microsoft Games/Age Of Empires II/Game/Scenario or C:/Program Files/LucasArts/Star Wars Galactic Battlegrounds/Game/Scenario

Image Instructions:

Info Image

ALSO: With both games, if you ‘Run As Administrator,’ you won’t have any issues with permissions. Unfortunately if you have maps in the scenarios folder that were created as non-admin, and then you run the  game as an administrator you won’t be able to access those save files.





 UPDATED: 23/09/2014

AoE 2 can’t find saved scenario files in explorer
SWGB can’t find saved scenario files in explorer
AoE 2 can’t find .scx file
SWGB can’t find .scx file

Life Ruined? Oh please.

Okay, I’ve about had it.
I’m sick of everyone being way, way too over-dramatic.
Yes all you people on MySpace are the main target of this post, I
can’t believe you.

Why do you people say that your life is ruined?
Well from what I’ve read it’s because ‘people don’t like you’ or ‘your
boyfriend or girlfriend broke up with you’ or ‘you can’t get a
Gawd, you people need help.
Because your worlds revolve around relationships, around ‘Needing to
be popular’ about people ‘needing to like them.’

It’s not the end of the world!
Your life isn’t over just because someone dumps you, cos you think
no one likes you.
Half the time people do like you! But a few people aren’t enough for
you! You need everybody to like you! Life doesn’t work that way buster
so deal with it!

And as for girlfriends and boyfriends! Many of you have had 8 even 12
already! Some people haven’t had any and they are happy as can be.

The main problem here is that many of you have meaningless
relationships, only going out cos you thing you have to, heaps of
people go out for a day or a week and stop. Classic examples of
meaningless relationships.

The relationship has to be genuine for it to be emotionally efficient.
Meaningless relationships lead to being emotionally depressed.

Grow up,

Get a life and stop having to rely on other people for you to be happy!

I think I’m done now,