My Painful War of Total Pre-Exam Doom
These last few days seem to have been going quite… painfully.
Exams are approaching fast, and it’s no secret that they are an incredibly important aspect of school life. Essentially you’re controlling your own future in employment opportunities. So it comes as no surprise that I find it highly suspicious that the closer we get to exams, the more attacked and damaged I seem to become.
I mentioned in one of my previous posts that I was not thinking clearly, like my brain had been clouded up by some evil mastermind’s “Ben’s Brain Destroy-O-Nater 2000” – I even assumed that confectionery was to blame, laced with thought-deterring chemicals by a spiteful arch-nemesis.
But this week, it seems to be getting worse… On Saturday I was feeling very unmotivated, I was just… ‘bleh’ – I felt very lacking in the inspiration department. It’s Sunday that decided to kick me right where it hurts… (Uh, not there. A bit higher) – The stomach.
Late Saturday night some mongrel of a virus clambered into my body and started urinating on all of my walls. I awoke on Sunday and was incredibly ill. The ‘bleh’ that I had felt on Saturday was now replaced by a ‘BLEEAIHWODIHOGIWEEEEH!’
Then a few minutes later, ‘BLAWJOUAOWUGHGHGHOUGH… *Gasp* …BAUGH BAUGH BAUGH.’
I was restrained to rest for the entirety of the day, not able to eat anything. My drink bottle was my only hunger-soothing friend. I slowly got better, then on Monday I took a day off school to regain strength and to try and catch up on homework I hadn’t been able to do on the weekend. This plan didn’t work all too well.
Late Monday night, I felt great. As good as new, I could have taken on Chuck Norris… Though I wouldn’t have gotten far. I lay down in bed, took a drink from my drink bottle and lay down to mentally prepare a to-do list for school tomorrow.
My stomach rumbled for the first time in several hours… It began to ache. I began to get very, very annoyed. Because as it turns out, I somehow re-infected myself with the stomach virus I had on Sunday by drinking from the same water bottle. How the hell is that even possible? Surely my body would have built up an immunity by now? If you see that same shifty guy in the dark sunglasses with the words “I’m a Stomach Virus Bastard” written across his chest YOU DON’T LET HIM IN! I mean come on!
Ah, I’m now feeling rubbish again… and what’s even better, is that today some bright spark kicked a soccer ball straight into my eye. Now it’s bruised, painful… and a conversation starter for basically every moron known to man.
“Hey nice eye, haha haha.”
Yeah, that’s great, the same thing that the last fourteen people said.
“Hey nice eye, haha, been fightin’ cuz?”
Wow, the addition of those few words really made it original, well bloody done.
I’m leaving now,
See you later.
“Hey nice eye, haha haha.”
“Piss off”